Suffice to say that things that needed to end ended, and wonderful new things have grown in their stead. Much like Yellowstone after their catastrophic fire, new life came far sooner and far greener than expected.
Tonight is the first night in six days that I'm spending the night alone. Being in my twenties I know that it would be expected of me to relish the time alone, to revel in my so-called freedom. But I'm not.
No, rather I find myself missing him. Being in my twenties, I know that it would be expected of me to be missing the sex. Well, there is that, but that's not what I find myself missing. I miss him, the touch, the scent, the presence... the someone else to cook for, to eat with, to smile at. The arm to lean against, the embrace to fall into... the soft but steady noise of another's breathing. That is what I miss. My boys are here, the cat rather close (and for once not on my lap), and they have their own patterns... but its not the same.
I lay on the bed to read... and I miss his warmth. I sit on the computer, for it at least has something to occupy me, and from time to time he does something, like "poking" me. That helps, but its not the same as being tickled against my will. Knowing me, I would NOT expect to miss that, but I do.
Because it makes him smile, and that makes it all worth it.
So long story short... I miss you, and I'll see you soon.
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