I was just on the phone with someone I am perfectly comfortable with. It was one of those kind of easy, lazy conversations about nothing important where it's just nice to just chat for a while. Then all of a sudden she gets off the phone, rather than the normal "I'll let go" then more talking and so on and so forth. Nothing was going on, and I know her well enough to know if there was.
I'm pretty sure I was just boring her. She's not dull herself, but not exactly exciting either. At least not the face she presents to me, what her friends or cousins might say I'm not so sure, but that's irrelevant. We've always had an easy calm relationship.
Which makes me wonder... How dull must I be to be boring her? Sure we didn't have anything special to talk about, but we don't usually when we talk. I know I should probably just let it go, but I feel... well... so very very boring. Ironically, I then decide to write one of the dullest blogs that I've had on here so far. I suppose I should at least try to make it more interesting.
On that note, this has made me wonder just how much of the personality we present to people is subconscious, and at what point we become so comfortable that we don't even notice when we're being boring. While I admit, I could be a bit more long winded than usual, living here alone and not seeing people all that often. Based on a PBS documentary I'm watching off and on, socialization is a biological need, as important as anything else we require for our health. It could be that in reaching out for it, I'm going a bit overboard on mundane conversation.
On the other side of it, could I just be so comfortable with this person that I just chat about the little things and don't focus on it being a good conversation? Or maybe it's just that with people we've known for a long time, we develop different personas, and that the more comfortable we are the more boring we become, between knowing each other well and not striving to impress them? Who knows, I don't.
Oh well, this dull boy needs to go figure out what the hell he's going to do for dinner. Probably chicken... nice, bland, mundane chicken. Seems fitting.
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