The Past

The past is... interesting. On the one hand, some things that people do they may come to be ashamed of for a wide variety of reasons. On the other hand, that is what led them to where they are now, and if not for that they wouldn't be where they are or with who they are. This can be good or bad. On the third hand, on this odd metaphorical three handed creature, there may have been events in play of which they were not aware at the time which shaped events. While the ultimate responsibility does not change, these occasional events should be taken into account.

Before anyone starts thinking anything, let me clear the air. I did not do something recently of which I am ashamed. This is in no way inspired by actual events beyond a conversation, which was not harsh or critical, but merely objective and curiosity-driven.. and I am suddenly aware that there is a cat next to my foot, which I did not know about until he pushed a cord down on my foot. Rather startling.

I should also mention that I have no main point on this post. I have no moral of the story, I have no theory to hold forth for consideration, I have nothing even somewhat humorous other than the bit about the cat. But just something I'm thinking about.

I should also point out that I was not truly aware until this very moment that I no longer indent paragraphs, but rather skip a line. There, another semi-humorous bit. Yay.

But I've strayed from my point for a good three paragraphs now. Or train of thought rather. The past shapes us, it creates the present being we each call "me." If, for instance, we had not taken one path in life, we would not have a new family, even if there were horrible consequences. But then we would not have learned what we have. Or if you had taken another path, made a mistake... mistake it may well have been, but it led you to something worthwhile. Or, to sate my need for three examples, you might have strayed from a path but rejoined it, but if you hadn't you wouldn't be exactly who you are now, not as strong, or understanding of what lies off of the path.

Take this photograph. Yes, amazingly, I am actually going to discuss the attached photo on a post. You can look at this photo three ways. One, you can say it is such a shame that that post blocked the snow from being a perfect blanket. Secondly, you could say it's a shame it snowed at all, covering the area in a thin layer of snow that then just melted and became an ugly mess (it did, and it was taken in Louisiana which freaks out any time it snows). Or, third, you can say that if it had not snowed, and the wind had not stayed steady, and if that pole had not been there... then this rather beautiful photo (especially when printed) would have never been possible.

I think that's what the past is... whatever the path you choose... I really do believe there is something, be it an instant or an entire portion of your life, when everything is truly worth it. If you had not done something you regret, you might well not have been there for that moment, or that chance meeting, or the child you created, or the family you gained, or that moment stolen in time that gives you peace in a whirl-wind paced life. If you had not made your mistakes, everything would be different. And while sometimes it might be nice... when you get where you're going, would you trade your friends or your loved one or your family, on a chance that things might be better? They might be, but you wouldn't be who you are or with the people you're with.

So regret? It's understandable.. but it got you where you are now. I for one, despite everything I've been through, hell and all... I wouldn't change it.

What do you know? I guess I did have a point after all.